For some reason I have always been a magnet to what ordinary people would call «problems» or even «trouble». Ever since kindergarten I fought other kids and forcefully objected to much of what the authorities did or said, often with very negative consequences for myself. After kindergarten I ended up attending an Iraqi public school in Baghdad for one year, and of course this didn’t change anything; I fought other kids there too, and was no less in opposition to the authorities. Back home in Soviet Norway the story continued; I was fighting other kids and objecting to much of what the teachers said or did. The explanation for this was at the time that I had an over-developed sense of justice, and reacted to all injustice done to myself or to others, and even on behalf of others when they themselves did not dare to speak up for themselves. Some would say I was courageous, because I fought older kids too – much older kids – but I am sure many would just call me stupid instead. The teachers for sure hated me. Now, I was always afraid when I fought others, but I failed to let the fear or perhaps reason take hold of me. I also always felt sorry for the kids I beat up, even – and in fact in particular – older kids. One of the worst (and in a sense also best) memories I have in my life was the time when I was in the 4th grade and beat up two 6th grader bullies at the same time. The other kids thought it was cool, and I was celebrated for this, but at the expense of the two beaten, humiliated and crying 6th graders.
In junior high school the story continued, but by then the teachers explained it by the fact that I was arrogant; intolerant towards the weakness of others and incapable of hiding my contempt for those who – as I saw it – deserved it. In other words; I was too honest for my own good, and I guess some would say that I was too stupid not to express my opinion when I should have understood that it would lead to me getting into trouble. But I knew that perfectly well, and why should I be afraid to get into trouble? Isn’t injustice worse when ignored, than when you perhaps have to suffer to have it corrected? I thought so. I think so. To any true European the pain of others is often much worse to bear than your own pain.
Today some would perhaps say that I am socially inept, but I object to that idea, because I know perfectly well what others feel and how they will react to what I do or say, but… I don’t care. Inflicting emotional or even physical pain unto others is not always a bad thing, and justice is always more important than the petty feelings of individuals. In fact, inflicting pain unto others is often the only solution, the only way to wake them up, to force them into taking a stand, to make them do what is right, or at least to make them think for a second.
“I never say anything to provoke, but I do provoke to say something.”
The trouble I get into myself when I fight for the truth, for justice and for a future for Europe is something I welcome; this is a sacrifice I am willing to make. In fact, this is a sacrifice I am unable not to make, because I am European in mind, spirit and body, and to be European is to be Just and Honest – and Proud too. The self-sacrificial will of the European man is in fact egotistical, because this is what brings him Fame and Honour, and he knows this, cultivates this and benefits from this in the long run.
Chivalry; the European (Pagan) Spirit surviving into Christian Times, not because of but in spite of Christianity:
The evils of our world is but an opportunity for the European man to gain Honour, from bravely fighting these evils. Let us do so, all of us (by legal means, of course). The first to fall is the luckiest one. The one most hated by our enemies is the bravest. The one most lied about is the one who most efficiently and fearlessly spoke the Truth! Our brave and honourable forebears are here with us, not fighting alongside us, but fighting themselves – because we are them! Honour prevails! Justice prevails! Europe prevails! Hail Ôðinn! For Fame and Glory! HailaR WôðanaR!
